Coaches have no true friends do they?

[CCC]

based on rquest that I post this on the junior high thread:
The longer I am in the business of coaching the more I see and hear people complaining about coaches at all levels. It seems to me that few people sincerely respect and value what coaches do for the young women and men they spend their time with. I have seen people that would rather have their son or daughter play every minute of each game then to have the team win the game. And if their child does not play enough then they become negative toward the coach and begin to involve their son or daughter in these conversations. My belief is that the parents who take this turn toward this negativity generally have children they are reluctant to critic and discipline themselves. Some parents have become enablers to their children and have lost the ability to lead by example and remember OR NOT what it was like when they played a particular sport. I have seen some parents who are genuinely concerned for all the players and the success of their particular school. Looking back I am so proud of my parents for not becoming the group of apathy that sits together in the stands when I was that kid in the bottom 15 on the team getting my most deserved 1.3 seconds of playing time per game when I was in middle school. The funny thing was that by the time the bottom 5 of the 15 reached 10th grade we all were starters. I wonder if that was because my parents were in my ear about how bad or good my coach was or if the time I put in the game IN THE OFF SEASON, finally paid off. I know what is the off season. I feel people are in the age of entitlement and that working hard means nothing any more. If you are a parent who supports your child and school and can say that with true passion you are such an asset to your child and school. I remember a time when coaches were treated as people and not the enemy and fans and parents supported their team but they have caused coaches to only associate with their staffs and players. Now when people or parents talk to coaches the coach had to wonder what the conversation is really about and the crowd thinks the parent is sucking up. I'm not sure how to change this epidemic but it is alive and real with great teams as well as bad. Maybe we should start back to the grass roots of being honest with our children and letting them know it's not always someone else's fault but that they might not be as gifted as the girl or boy in front of them or would that make our children mad at us? What happened to the child worrying if mom or dad would be mad at them instead? I love coaches at all levels and all sports for what they do and having the ability to not judge kids on who they are and aren't afraid to tell their players what they are good at and what they are not. What a gift to be able to show student athletes their positive and negative skill base and be able to take the time to work with them on their deficiencies each and every day and not just talk about it or blame it on their parents biological makeup. I think we all as a society need to take a step back and focus on our support for all your school programs and the advisors and coaches who devote numerous hours for the benefit of someone else's child.
Oh and by the way I need to throw in coaches spouses who agonize over every lose and hug on every win because as my wife calls coaching her mistress but yet finds herself supporting me and my players all the way. If anyone should dislike the coach it should be their family for taking away precious hours and time from their own family for someone else's child. Life is to short enjoy each other we are not here for very long ;)

[hornetnut]

Well said.

[MClaw]

Amen

[IBTT]

Agreed.

[Fundamentals]

This article in Forbes Magazine shows us yet another example of success through failure. Jordan, Eienstein all failed early in life then worked hard to be successful. Hard being a coach when most parents want things to be even and reward mediocrity.

"Carroll’s path to football’s elite was a checkered one, and it speaks to the wondrous, life enhancing value of failure as the driver of future success. Put plainly, when we shield individuals and businesses (think the bailed out banks and carmakers) from their errors, we perpetuate what makes them mediocre while robbing them of the knowledge that would make them successful."

[bookem13]

That is very well said, and I'm sorry you've obviously experience this behavior. This is really the very reason I left coaching. I played college football, and when I came home, I had a true passion for helping kids. I coached varsity football for several years, then moved to the little leagues when my son was old enough to start playing. I can honestly say that I enjoyed every second I spent with all of the kids, but the parents.....WOW! It's really unfathomable what is said by some of these people, and of course, the same people chirping the loudest wouldn't give you 2 minutes of their time to help another kid. Bless all of our coaches...true heroes in our kids' lives!

[IBTT]

That is very well said, and I'm sorry you've obviously experience this behavior. This is really the very reason I left coaching. I played college football, and when I came home, I had a true passion for helping kids. I coached varsity football for several years, then moved to the little leagues when my son was old enough to start playing. I can honestly say that I enjoyed every second I spent with all of the kids, but the parents.....WOW! It's really unfathomable what is said by some of these people, and of course, the same people chirping the loudest wouldn't give you 2 minutes of their time to help another kid. Bless all of our coaches...true heroes in our kids' lives!

Totally agree!!